Philippians 4:4-9

Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again—rejoice! Let everyone see that you are considerate in all you do. Remember, the Lord is coming soon.

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.  Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.  Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you.

For years, I’ve been encouraging my clients to keep a Beauty Journal – a journal used to physically record all the things that went right in a day.  Why do I think this is an important exercise?  Well, just take a moment and look around you.  How much of your world is full of negativity and sadness, destruction and despair, heart ache and heart brokenness?  These things are everywhere!  They surround us.  And if there aren’t enough of them in your own, personal life the media will make sure that you get your fill.

It is amazing that more people are not swept away in the depths of depression when experiencing this fallen world.  I know that many chose to ignore the pain that surrounds them and they are able to “create” a world that is more comfortable by denying the reality of the world and relationships.  (i.e., “My husband really isn’t physically abusive.  He just had a bad day.”  “My daughter really doesn’t have a drug problem.  She’s just going through a phase.”  “I really do not have a drinking problem.  I just need a drink to relax after work.”  “I really want this new high definition television and paying off the credit won’t take that long.  I work hard, I deserve it.”  “I really don’t work that many hours.  Money is important.  My wife and kids understand.” …)

It is important to develop some honesty when looking at what is going on around you.  Take an honest look and take it in.  The reality of our fallen world is heavy.  But don’t stop there.  I challenge you to look deeper – for the beauty.

In and amongst all that is fallen, God provides so much that is rich and beautiful.  We just often times miss it because of all the negativity that surrounds us.  Did you know that research has revealed that it takes nine positive things to undo the impact of one negative thing on our human psyche?  It is almost as if the negativity in our world has a powerful magnet drawing our attention. It is as if we are automatically pulled to what is negative and the power that the negativity has is 9 times more powerful than a moment of joy.  It is because of this that we must become more proactive in seeking out all that is good.

If we stop looking toward those things that suck the life and  joy out of us and start looking to those things that are “true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable” and claim them as the God-given gifts they are, we would begin to enjoy more moments with God’s peace filling our hearts.  The peace that passes all understanding can be ours…it can be yours!  God has placed all that is beautiful in our world to fill us with the experience of his love.  We must seek out the beauty, claim these things as the gifts they are and hold them in our hearts.

This is where the Beauty Journal comes into play.  The negativity in our lives is a habit of thought.  Change the habit!  Actively seek  out the beauty!  The Beauty Journal is simple.  It only takes three simple steps to complete.  You can handle that!

1) Look for 10 Beautiful Things -

I challenge you to start looking for 10 things a day that bring lightness to your heart, a smile to your face, a peace to your mind.  What are 10 things that are gifts that God is bringing into your day…just 10!  They can be as simple as your car starting with the first turn of the key all the way to something as glorious a beautiful sunrise.  I don’t care what they are…I know they are there.

2) Claim Them As Your Own -

Write them down.  Get a journal (get a piece of paper!) and write them down – EVERYDAY – into your journal.  By writing them down, you are claiming them and making them your own.  Have you ever thought about claiming a sunrise as your own?  If not, why?  God could have made the sunrise without all of the beauty that comes with it.  He could have been practical and just made the sunrise simply functional.  But he didn’t.  He made it beautiful – for you!  He wants you to be reminded about how crazy he is about you!

3) Hold Them In Your Heart -

As you write these 10 things down, day after day, hold them in your heart.  Read the list, every  day!  As you read over the list of gifts that are given and you’ve claimed, the gift of the beauties literally multiplies right in front of your eyes.  You will visually see the power of God’s gifts as reminders of his presence in your life.  As you daily reflect on these gifts and praise God for them, the peace that passes all understanding will fill you.  It can’t help but happen.

What is the catch?  There is one!  You have to be an active participant.  You have to do your part.  God provides the beauty.  You have to experience it.  If someone gives you a beautifully wrapped and carefully selected birthday gift and you never open it – what’s the point?  The same is true with the gifts from God.  You have to do your part and receive them!

You must look for the gifts, claim them as your own and hold them in your heart.  When you do, you may be surprised at how the  negativity in the world loses its power and how the gifts start filling your days and your heart.  It will become a habit to look for these things.  It will become part of you.  God’s love will fill you and you will experience God in every beautiful thing.  From the pen that has ink in it to the awesome show of a lightening display to the song of a bird to the laughter of a baby – God’s love will flow through the gifts he is giving you and the peace that passes all understanding will fill your heart and mind – negativity will have no room!

Change your life – look for God’s gifts of beauty!

With our world weighing down on us, it is important that we learn to deliberately make decisions and adopt behaviors and thoughts that are healthy for us.  This doesn’t mean that we ignore those things that bring distress to our day.  Instead, we are to challenge ourselves to think about them in a more clear and honest way – “In the overall scheme of things – how big is this problem?”  Or…”How big is our God!?”

Often times our feelings of depression, anxiety and despair result from you trying to take control over things which you have no control.  This is a battle of anguish that you cannot win, nor that you can possibly overcome.  It is impossible to control so many things in this world – and I am compelled to ask, “Is it even your job to control these things?”

Look over the suggestions offered below that challenge your habitual ways of looking at life’s challenges.  What would your life look like if you could make these your new rules for living?  How would your life be different?  What about these things could leave you enjoying a blessed peace of mind and embracing all that God has gifted you to be and to start seeing yourself through His eyes of love?

1.  Choose to trust God and His word

When you embrace the truth that there are many things about life over which you have no control; you can do one of two things.  You can either take on a “victim” approach to thinking which reinforces the rule of living that things happen to “poor you” no matter what you do or how you do it.  

Or, you can take the position that you trust God, no matter what happens.  You trust that He will always provide for you – sometimes in ways that seem beyond your understanding – but you know He is always there.  You know that if this door closes, there will be another that will open.  Although you may not feel you have the inner strength needed to make it through the day on your own, you know that God is there with you – no matter what – and his presence in your life will get you through your current struggle(s).

 2.  Let go and let God –

To really let go and let God, you must embrace the first point mentioned above.  It means letting go of the need to control your life and life’s circumstances over which you have no control.  One of the behaviors that always leads to anxiety and depression is when you try to control those things that aren’t yours to control.  You want a world of no war.  You want loving and lovely children.  You want relationships that lift you up instead of tearing you down.  You want health instead of illness.  You want security instead of questions.  You want your life to be filled with the realization of all your hopes and dreams.

But, sometimes life doesn’t work that way.  Sometimes bad things happen to good people.  Sometimes there is evil in the world.  Sometimes you get sick.  Sometimes your relationships are abusive.  Sometimes you lose your job.  Sometimes life hands you the opposite of what you want.  You need to let go of what you define as important – the way you want your life to be and instead start looking for all of the blessing God has filled your life with.  They are there.  Let go of YOUR definition of what “should” be and embrace God’s definition of what is.  Always set a focus on God – He is bigger than all of our trials – He is always there.

3.  Embrace the power that God has gifted to you –

God has given each person power in their lives.  You have a personal power in the form of self-control and adaptation.  You can choose to search for the next door that may present itself, or you can quit and get stuck at the closed door.  You get to choose.

One of the greatest tools to use in exercising this self-power is your mind.  Your mind is one of your strongest allies, if you know how to use it.  You have the power to choose to focus on the good surrounding you in the world or you have the power of focusing on the negative things that are there.  (I promise you that there are both!)  We start seeing and experiencing those things that we want to see and experience.  What we look for and observe become almost habit.  Where do you focus your attention?

To really experience personal growth you need to be able to exercise your power by saying over and over (no matter what happens), “God is with me and whatever happens, I will handle it with His help.”  When fear, hurt or pain starts entering your day, remind yourself that God is bigger and that all and the power he has given you is bigger than any fear or pain you may be feeling.  So when the “what-ifs” in life start driving you crazy, simply cut them off – exercise your personal power and know that no matter what happens God is with you and you can handle it!

 4.  Embrace the lessons life has to offer –

Many of life’s challenges are just busting with potential lessons.  One of the easiest ways of removing your focus from a “victim” way of thinking to an “embracing life” way of living is by looking for the lesson that is there – for there is always a lesson…always.  If you view all of life’s experiences as opportunities for personal growth, it will help you let go of your need to have things go a certain way – your way.  You will become more comfortable and confident facing challenges and growing in your faith of God.  You will be fully able to let go and let God.  For your confidence in His presence and belief in His love for you will help you focus on learning all of life’s lessons instead of ridding your life of the struggles you have faced.

 5.  Collect and embrace the “heroes” in your life –

Look around you.  There are people you know and people you have heard of that are living heroes.  People who – no matter what their life circumstances – are living and growing in life.  To collect these heroes, you need to deliberately look for them and then to them for inspiration in learning.  Who do you know (even if you don’t know him/her personally) that inspires you?  Who seems to have been able to embrace all the life-lessons presented no matter what life sends their way?  Who do you know that is living a full life as a “lover of life” rather than a victim?  Who are your heroes?

 6.  Look for your Blessings –

Life is full of gifts and blessings.  Are you seeing them?  Do you recognize when they are there or do you focus so much on those things that bring you challenges that you forget to take a moment to bask in the glory of all the beauty and love that God provides you each and every day?  As you go through your day, take inventory of the beauty God has sent your way.  Begin noticing all, even the little things that are given to you each moment.  The sunrise, a delicious piece of chocolate, a baby’s smile, a stranger’s kindness, a beautiful piece of music, a perfect rose, the company of a new friend…do you see them?  Are you unwrapping the beauty of this gift?  Are you taking inventory of all the glorious gifts that are here for you?

 7.   Live a life of meaning –

There is an incredible sense of accomplishment when you decide to make a difference in your little corner of the world.  Living a life of meaning is making the conscious decision to think and behave in such a way that your presence serves as a gift to others.  This is a way you can pass on the beauty to all of those we encounter.  Do you share grace so that people experience the love of Christ in your actions and words?  Or do you make the decision to get agitated when someone cuts you off on the freeway?  Do you get angry at the person with 12 items in the 10 items or less isle at the grocery store?  Do you become furious when you partner or friend is 30 minutes late because she stopped to carry in the elderly neighbor’s groceries?

As you go through your days are you – the person cutting others off – in the express line with an extra 1 or 3 items – are you chronically late – are you throwing your garbage out your car window – do you give a dirty look to the waitress that just spilled your water?  Make a difference in the world, even if it is just a small difference.  Leave today better than where you found it.  Pass a little love and grace forward.

As you live each and every day choosing to adopt these changes in your life, you will find a whole new sense of peace – a peace that is coming from within you – within your heart.  As you let go of the worries, concerns, hurts, pains, disappointments…of each day, you will have more room to experience and embrace the love God wants to share with you.  To live your life with an attitude of generosity, grace and love – toward yourself and toward your world!  God will use the vessel of you in loving and wonderful ways and you will begin to understand the peace that passes all understanding as those people you encounter will see the love of Christ in your eyes.

 I agree with the authors’ premise that it is important to focus on the good things in life, but it is from that point forward where my philosophy of life takes a different turn.  I do believe it is important to focus on the good rather than putting all of our energy in thinking about the bad: worries, anxieties and those things beyond our control.  But, I don’t believe that by focusing on good, that anyone has the power to bring those beautiful things into life, or that if you focus on the bad, you are only inviting the bad things to invade your paradise.  Beauty and sadness are all around you.  It is what you focus on (what you are looking for) that defines your experience.  The potential of unbridled happiness is there – everywhere.  You just need to focus on it, so you see it.  If you don’t look for it, you won’t ever see it – but it is there all of the time – all around you.

Grandma

My grandmother seemed to excel at finding the beauty in the world.  At the young age of 13, she had to quit school after her 8th grade year, and begin working.  Coming from a large, Danish, immigrant family of 12 children at the beginning of the 1900’s, the sons were the only ones allowed to finish school through 12th grade.  If you were a daughter in my grandma’s family, you didn’t return to school after 8th grade.  Instead, you went to work as a house girl for a wealthy family in the surrounding area.

 For my grandmother, her assigned wealthy family happened to be 50 miles away from her home and family.  For a 13 year-old girl to move in with a strange family 50 miles away is an incredible concept to me.  Can you begin to imagine what that must have been like?  Without automobile transportation, 50 miles was a very time consuming trip by horse and wagon, and even more lengthy by foot.  But, that was expected and that is what my grandmother did.

 She didn’t talk much about that time.  When she did tell me about it, she never complained but rather, reflected on it with a sparkle in her eye.  She then quickly would move into the part of her life’s story where she played the “fiddle” with a band for barn dances.  That is how she met my grandfather.  He was an early 1900’s “groupie.”  He followed Grandma from barn dance to barn dance until he finally won her heart.  Grandma and Grandpa met when she was 18 years-old.  She loved to share that story with me.  She loved music, and she loved Grandpa.  It was a beautiful story and I cherish it to this day.  I think I especially enjoy this story since it was so obvious to me that Grandma was focusing on all of the joy from her youth to share with me – rather than the difficulties of being separated from her family or not being allowed to finish school.

 On the Lake

 When I was very young, I would spend time at my grandparent’s home.  It was on Beed’s Lake in Northern Iowa.  It is a small lake, yet it was beautiful in scenery.  Houses were all along the northern shoreline – up the hill from the water.  On the south side of the lake there still is a state park, campgrounds, swimming area, and a dam.  As teenagers, we would always take a walk around the lake.  Not much more than an hour or two, depending on how many things we needed to stop and see along the way.  We always stopped at the dam, though.  Watching the water splashing over the rocks as it fell to the stream below was always mesmerizing.  There was something quite spiritual about sitting next to the dam and walking around the stream…it was so tranquil…even with the sound of the crashing water.

 Grandma and Grandpa’s home was on the northern shore of the lake.  The house was up the hill about 200 yards from the shore.  I would sit for hours on the dock, just listening, watching and taking in all that was there.  The yard was full of trees and my grandparents had landscaped their yard as a retreat for birds of all kinds.  Grandma used to take me out with her while she tended to her many rose bushes and other flowers.  We would talk about the plants and would watch for songbirds.  It was there that I saw my first cardinal.  I thought it was the most beautiful bird I had ever seen, with its red feathers.  It took my breath away.  Grandma taught me about many of the birds that came to feast at the feeders Grandpa tended to every day.  We would also sit on their porch and just listen and watch.  It was beautiful.  It was a wonderful place to visit – I felt loved and so close to beauty.  Some of my happiest memories are there at Beed’s Lake.

Grandma never really sat me down to ‘teach me’ about the importance of looking for beauty.  She never told me how it was all around and I just had to keep my eyes open and my heart ready to embrace it all.  No, her lesson was much more subtle.  Instead, we would be talking about something else when she would interrupt with a quiet, “shhhhh…listen/look!”  Then she would point out a deer, a bird, a piece of music playing, a colorful sunrise, a child’s laughter, a twinkling star, all of those beautiful things that were surrounding us.  Just by living and being present with me, she taught me how to see the beauty all around me.  As I watched her and saw her embrace her surroundings – I learned how to find my happiness through the moments of beauty that I encountered every day.

What Did I Ever Do?

This lesson was really driven home to me when she moved into a nursing care facility.  It was an old mansion that had been added on to and refurbished.  The main mansion housed the parlor and dining room.  My aunt, who was the administrator of the home, had worked feverishly to restore the beautiful mansion that once was a home for a very wealthy family.  The parlor was finished in period pieces and it was beautiful in every way.  It was here, one day, where Grandma and I had retreated for an afternoon visit.  We were visiting about the recent presidential candidates (she loved talking politics) when she stopped mid-sentence and quietly shook her head from side to side.  She said, “Oh, Jackie!  I sometimes wonder what I ever did to deserve to live in such a beautiful place like this!”

I was overwhelmed with emotions.  I had heard so many elderly people complaining about having to live in a care facility and there were people in that very room who were obviously depressed and sitting in grief.  I was sitting with an old woman who was overcome with the beauty that was surrounding her.  She saw past her walker and the strain her heart experienced.  She saw past her wrinkled skin and deteriorating body to all the beauty that surrounded her.  She was in the moment, thankful for all her eyes took in – she was genuinely happy.